Thursday, March 27, 2008

How It All Ends

Life certainly isn't tidy, mine less so than most, and the point of blogging would seem to be that, like life, we can't know how it all turns out. My sister sent me an Email months ago wanting to know about Pantyhose Guy, and it's been 2 months since I heard from him so I guess I can wrap up that story. Yes, he walked out of the restaurant with that well-earned pair of hose. And yes, I took them off right there in the restaurant, which is not quite as graceful -- when one is sitting at a table in relatively plain view -- than I had imagined (isn't that so true about so many fantasies)?!? I just reviewed my Email and found, not surprisingly, that the last exchange was from me, warning him that he would be material too good to pass up. He had found my blog and immediately told me so, unlike, it would seem, Mr. 36C, who did not tell me he'd found it and seems to have thought to use it to set little quizzes for me, testing my honesty.

Interesting question, that, about honesty, isn't it? Really, what is our obligation to expose about ourselves? I remember another man who I call The Bad German, with whom I, in a spontaneous spirit of cross-cultural openness, sat down and disclosed most of my history and less-than-conventional views. He then proceeded to send me nasty Emails (in truth, by the end more self-questioning and less nasty) for the next 6 days, which I allowed as a sort of cultural experiment, until cutting it off with a brief Kein Kontact Bitte (no contact please). For Germans, perhaps (and I don't have enough experience to draw any conclusions), each relationship means a clean slate? Americans (or at least American Catholics), on the other hand, revel in messy disclosures, as if each dramatic confession takes us a step closer to purging past sins.

Should I disclose that I blog, even if I think that might not be culturally and/or emotionally appropriate? And that if these men exceed the ho-hum threshold, they could become material? Should these men, in turn, disclose that they are, in fact, not so unhappily married or more than barely girlfriended or even inveterate cheats? Is ignorance bliss? [I tend to think so but I'm no more capable of it than any other overly educated human with a too-large brain.] For myself, I very much more orient toward behavior; what goes on inside of someone else's head is that person's own business, in my opinion. Now blogging, there's an interesting dilemma, i.e., do my thoughts convert to behavior when I post them? So I'll circle back to my original question -- what is our responsibility to disclose?

Here's how it all ends, sis: I don't hear from Pantyhose Guy or Lost Sugar Daddy again. Mr. 36C and I go our separate ways, me because I cannot possibly understand someone who doesn't just ask me in person, and he because I don't just tell him! Meanwhile, I'm contemplating my next Craigslist ad: "Hi, I'm and if you like smart, sarcastic, iconoclastic women and can take the heat, drop me a line."


Almatina said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Katchita said...
This comment has been removed by the author.